Subject: Re: Commercial scale space tourism Date: Sat, 09 Nov 2002 20:41:51 GMT From: "Chuck, Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix 01" Newsgroups: alt.startrek.vs.starwars "bottle" <1@1.com> wrote in message news:aqivpj$seu$1@ultra.kfki.hu... > Hello everyone, Crow: Greetings money cows and other wastes of flesh.. > > My name is Victor Rozsnyay, Mike: Don't bother trying to pronounce it. Crow: My name is Johnny Boulyabasehassenfeffer. > CEO of Gravity Control Technologies. Tom: We make bras. > My company > has been developing aerospace technology capable of controlling gravity for > flight. Such technology would be instrumental in introducing commercial > scale space tourism flight within the next decade. Tom: Techniques have been perfected at the Wile E. Coyote Institute for the Applied Sciences. > > Thus far we have raised over 1 million dollars from a private investor for > proof of concept verification. Mike: Mr. Hussein is unavailable for comment. > The research conducted was successful. We > believe we know how gravity control can be implemented. Crow: We have currently purchased five thousand rubber balloons... > > We are no seeking 10 million dollars to build technology demonstrator > prototypes within the next 2 years. Unfortunately no traditional Venture > Capitalist will take the risk of financing our work. Tom: NO! Mike: My God, what has the world come to when people won't invest ten million dollars into a completely untested and unproven technology that would defy known physics. > Not to mention their > perceived loss of credibility. According to traditional science gravity > control does not exist. Even though companies like NASA, Crow: I wonder how my shares of NASA are doing right now. Tom: Ah, they peaked at the moon landing and dropped after Challenger. Trade 'em in and by some of that new Homeland Defense Department stock; I think it's going to be pretty hot. > Boeing, Lockheed > Martin, BAE Systems and Raytheon frequently visit our site, no one will > finance our work. Crow: They can't stop laughing long enough to sign the check. > > As our last ray of hope we torn to the general public. Mike: We call it Operation Sucker. > We have initiated a > program where everyday people can become part of history. Tom: It's called "dying." > By visiting our > website you can purchase advanced space tourism tickets for a future 8 hour > flight. We will use the money obtained from your ticket purchase to finish > research and build a prototype capable of gravity controlled flight. Crow: I have all my money tied up in that holo-deck research. > > The price of the ticket is only a dollar. We felt that everyone would have a > dollar they might be willing to risk and contribute toward our cause. It's > the price of a cup of coffee. Mike: I already sent my dollar to starving children in Africa. > When we are successful in our development, all > those who purchased tickets will experience the thrill of space flight. Tom: As they shed their human containers and follow a comet. -- Chuck "Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung. " - Voltaire