***** Chap 1 - The Thief ***** Captain Seifert heave a sigh and glanced at the chronometer on his desk. He glanced again in disbelief. _It couldn't be that early in the morning_, he thought. He had been working on the paperwork all night and now had only three Standard Time Parts until planetary dawn. _All the red tape I have to fight through just to request a new assistant_. Imperial Regulations Forms. Requisition Forms. Requisition Form Requisition Forms. Forms about forms within forms to receive forms. _Scritch_... _Scritch, scritch_... _Sithspawn rodents!_ was the first thought that came to mind. But, no. The exterminator had come and gon only a few planetary days ago. _What besides rodents makes such a sound in an Imperial Recruiter's office?_ he pondered. _Rebel saboteurs!_ Seifert quietly turned off the desk lamp which had been the sole illumination for the office so late at night. On a whim, he took the keypad of his holo-datapad and sat beneath his desk, pulling the chair close to him. He unplugged the 3D visual text displayer that would normally create words floating above the desk, and began to type. ----- Self-proclaimed master thief Rob Dalton had finished slicing the lock on the door only a few minutes ago. Now, he had recalled the insect sized reconnaissance droid and reveiwed his plan in his mind. After a quick run through, he eased open the door and entered as silently as possible. He stealthily walked over to the chosen stretch of wall and mentally guaged the thickness and guessed at the cutting time with his cumbersome laser torch. He walked back to the door, opaquing the electronic-controlled windows on the way. He opened the door again and grabbed the high powered cutter. He returned to the chosen wall and set the torch on a chair. Cracking his knuckles, he set about moving hte smaller of the two desks that occupied the room in order to cut apart the wall it blocked. Just when he was getting the desk out of the way, a barely visible green illumination cast his shadow on the wall. He spun and took up his best imitation of a fighter's stance. What he saw caught him off guard. Where he had expected a blaster-toting local constable to be holding a glowrod appeared only words. _Who are you and what do you want?_ "Who are you?!" came his instinctive reply. _Between you, me, and my blaster, that doesn't much matter, does it?_ "I guess not. Where are you?" _Are we playing twenty questions? Answer the question I asked you._ "Rob Dalton. Now where in the name of the Sith are you?!" _I'm the one pointing a blaster at you, so I ask the questions._ "Ok" Rob said as he started inching toward the high-energy laser cutter sitting in "standby" mode on the nearby chair. _So what do you want in my office, Rebel scum?_ "I'm not a Rebel and I'm not interested in your office. I'm trying to break into the Ysoff Bank next door." _Ahh. So you're going to try going through the wall, are you? Don't bother. I personally installed their military-grade security system. You'd be caught in no time._ "I'm not caught already?" Rob asked sarcastically. "How odd." _Oh, you're caught. I'm just saying what if._ "Stop arguing with me! I only argue on certain points. Now where are you?" _Look behind you._ Rob spun and fired, catching the flimsy duraplast door and blowing it out into the street. "I lied," came a voice from behind him. A blaster bolt, presumably from the same source, caught him in the ankle. As he fell, he spun and held the torch's beam trigger down, gouging a long burnt trench through the near wall, ending in a pile of smoldering flimsiplast. ----- "My forms!" bellowed Seifert as he watched the flames licking at the desk and the heat distorting the holo-image of the words. "It took me nearly a full day to fill out those forms." he growled. Dalton hit the floor with enough force to knock the wind out of him. The laser torch clattered away, out of reach. "You're gonna pay dearly for burning up those forms," said Seifert. "Wait a second. I have an idea..." He explained it to Dalton. "Yeah, yeah. Sure, I'll do it. Just get me a medpac, man!" Rob squeezed past the burning pain and through clenched teeth. "And if you break the contract, I'll hunt you down and kill you," said Seifert in his most emotionless voice. "Ok! Ok! Whatever! Just get me a medpac!" screamed Rob. ----- "Ladies and gentlebeings of the colony world of Ysoff I, I present to you the completely refurbished Imperial Recruiter's office." Seifert said into the microphone to the small crowd gathered in the plaza in front of the office. He gave a quick hand signal and a man walked forward to stand next to the podium. A man with a slight limp. "And to assist me in my duties and to run the office, my new assistant, _Private_ Datlon." ***** Chap 2 - The Admiral ***** Admiral Boyd looked at the tiny office before him. He glanced at the sign above the doorway. The odd symbols meant nothing to him, but, for some strange reason, he knew what it said. _Imperial Recruiter's Office_ _It couldn't be the Klingon Empire_, he thought. _I would recognize Klignon script. Then, for the first time, he began to think it odd that he could read this alien writing on his first try. He turned to the office next door. _Ysoff Planetary Bank_ This also caught him off guard. _Hasn't money been abolished since several centuries ago?_ As a final test, he looked at the small shop on the opposite side of the recruiter's office. _Sha ' rune Jay Antiques_ Now that he had a firm belief that he wasn't crazy, at least not entirely, now came a sudden fear. _Where am I? Certainly nowhere on Earth or in the Sol system._ Without a second thought, he entered the recruiter's office to find out where he was. ----- Captain Seifert heaved a sigh. Being on such a backwater world, barely anyone even wanted to consider joining the Imperial armed forces. Full of boredom and wondering what the private would say, he gave a great shove with his foot, totally clearing his desktop. "Private, I think I dropped something. Pick it up." "Two things. One, I'm your assistant, not your maid. And two, call me Rob or at least Dalton. Pick it up yourself, Seifert." Once the pri..._Dalton_ had turned back to his paperwork, Seifert spitted him with a cold glare. With a slam, the brand new durasteele dore opened revealing one of the funniest looking men currently on the planet, in Seifert's opinion. Aparently, Dalton hadn't been watching the man through the window and therefore was startled by his sudden entrance. He jumped nearly a full ten centimeters, and his hand crumpled the flimsiplast that it held. Once he got a good look at the newcomer, he made it a point to drop his stylus beneath his desk. When he bent to retreive it, Seifert could see him shaking with laughter. "Who are you, why are you wearing red pajamas, and what can we do for you?" "I am Admiral Boyd and--" "Admiral! I'm sorry. I guess I didn't recognize you in that silly costume." Seifert leapt to his feet saluting. Dalton attempted the same thing, neglecting the fact that he was still under his desk. _WHUMP!_ Seifert tried to hide his embarassment in his assistant as the admiral returned the salute. "What silly costume?" asked the admiral. "This is my uniform." "Sir? I realize we're far from Imperial Center, but I think that we would've heard if they changed the uniforms." "Imperial Center? Where's that?" "On all standard starcharts, Imperial Center is at Parsec Zero, sir." said Seifert, thinking this was some kind of test. _A test for the extremely stupid._, he thought. "Earth is the planet at Parsec Zero,...captain." said the Admiral, reading the nameplate on the floor at his feet. "Oh, no! Have the Rebels taken over Imperial Center and renamed it? And how could they ahve chosen a stupider name than 'earth'?" "As far as I know, Earth has always been Earth. It has never been changed to or from 'Imperial Center'. Now what Rebels do you speak of? No, wait. Vital information first. What planet and system is this?" "Sir? We're on Ysoff I in the Ysoff system, sir." "Wait a second," said Dalton, holding a hand to the rapidly swelling portion of the back of his head. "Are you a _Rebel_ admiral?" Expecting the worst, Seifert reached for his blaster. The admiral reached for a triangular thing with a handle stuck in a holster clipped on his belt. "No, I'm an admiral with the Federation, as I had expected you to be a captain in the Federation. Well, I tell you this: If you can get me back to my ship, you can both take commander possitions in my fleet. Do you have a shuttle handy?" "We've got our trusty _Unreliable_. She's only a Ghrtoc freighter, but she'll get you anywhere in the system." "No. I have reason to believe my ship is out of the system." "Then how'd you get here?" "I must've encountered a spacial anomaly that brought me from my galaxy, through the space-time continum and with the end result of my being here." "You mean 'I got sucked into a wormhole'?" "Not as eloquently put, but yes." "Can I talk to you for a second in the back, Dalton?" "Sure, boss." Dalton followed Seifert into the storage closet. "I think he's loony." "Yeah, but what do we do with him?" "Well, we could..." ----- Admiral Boyd could hear the murmuring coming from beyond the closed door, but ignored it. For the first time, he looked at the entire room. He wondered about the pile of papers and common desk items spilled on the floor. As he was looking at posters on the wall with bold titles such as "Your Emporer Needs You!" and "The Imperial Navy: It Isn't For Everyone", all in that strange script, he noticed that one of the white-armored troops had a blue left eye. He walked over and touched it with his finger. It tripled in size, swollowing the troop's head. He touched it again. It tripled in size again, swollowing the entire troop and the ones on either side of it. And the admirals finger. Thinking it his only escape back to his ship, he pushed his whole forearm through the hole... ----- Dalton and Seifert stepped out of the closet only a minute after they had entered, intent on bringing the false admiral to the local drunk tank. "He's gone," said Seifert. "Ah, well. We won't have to deal with him." "Just about quitting time, anyhow. Want to grab a bite at the tapcafe?" "If you're paying." "When hutts are handsome." "Just let me put out an APB on any guys wearing red pajamas." "Yeah. Hey! He stole one of our posters!" ***** Chap 3 - The Runaway ***** "Ok, then. I'll put out an APB on anybody wearing red pajamas _carrying a poster_. Is that better?" He typed on his datapad for a second or two. "There done. May we go eat now?" "Sure," said Dalton from the doorway. "Just remember, you're paying for the entire meal. Your's and--" The door whooshed open, slaming his foot between it and the wall. His bad foot. Dalton's eyes grew to the size of small moons. The man at the door, the second visitor of the night, stepped in out of the slight drizzle that had started just before the strange admiral had disappeared...and right under Dalton's fist. "What the frick was that for?!" the man screamed as he picked himself up off the floor. "I came here to apply for the Imperial Navy and I get punched!" "Look, I'm sorry. It's just that you crushed my foot." Dalton explained pointing at his throbbing toes. "I can just tell that's going to swell till it won't fit in my boots" he mumbled. Realizing it as his one change for promotion and transfer off the planet, Seifert piped up, "Stop squawbling and get the man a seat, Private Dalton!" Idiots--er... new recruits--like this didn't come in often, if at all. After the newcomer was seated and Dalton had regained his composure, Seifert went on. "Well. We're certainly glad to have a new recruit. This small colony doesn't produce many for the Empire, although I can think of one or two that went to the Rebel Alliance...those traitors." "Yes. I knew one of them," the newcomer stated with only mild disgust. "Ok. We'll, I suppose we can start on filling out the aplication forms." Seifert called up the standard form from the datapad and had it projected through the holo-display, flipped so the stranger could read them as the captain typed. "I trust you've had an anual physical from the Doc in the past year?" As the stranger nodded, Seifert went on, "Good, good. That'll save us some time. I'll just call it up from the colony databanks later and send the file as an attachment to this form. Let's get started on filling out the form, shall we?" Seifert read through the first several lines to himself. "Name, first before last." "Karrde, Talon" replied the stranger. As Seifert typed it into the datapad, a red indicator lit up next to it. The stranger couldn't see it on the holo-viewer, nor on the datapad. His curiousity peaked, Seifert typed a command to pause the display on the viewer so Karrde wouldn't see him looking up the problem. As he did, his eyes grew as big as Dalton's had been. "Private, come here." "Stop calling me private. You know I hate that,..._captain_" Dalton said as he walked over and took a look over Seifert's shoulder. Then he saw the problem and took a half step back, blinked three times, and took another look. Still there. "I'm sorry mister Karrde, but there is a warrant for your arrest," Seifert said as both he and Dalton pulled the heavy blaster pistols from their holster and pointed them at the man. "No, no. You see, Talon Karrde and I aren't the same man. The Doc noticed the same warrant when I got my physical a while back. The entire matter is cleared up with the local constables, I assure you." "If you're not Talon Karrde, why is your name Talon Karrde?" "I'm sure there are two Captain Seiferts in the entire Empire. And most likely two Private Daltons." "Don't call me that," snarled Dalton. "Sorry! Sorry!" "Well, I'm sure a DNA test, retinal scan, and fingerprinting will clear the entire mess up. You'll have to go back to the Doc to have those done, though." Seifert put away his blaster, but Dalton kept his pointed at the man, just in case. Karrde seemed perturbed and started figiting at the mention of a delay "Anyhow, let's continue with the application, shall we? The tests can be done later." "Yes. I agree." As they worked through question after question, the mysterious mister Karrde seemed to get more and more agitated as he read ahead. He checked his wrist chronometer and darted a glance back at the door. Obviously with his fears put aside, he turned back to the subject at hand. "And just one more question. What are your reasons for joining the Imperial Navy?" Karrde made no reply, but started figiting again. "Mister Karrde?" Karrde began sweating nearvously and looked as if he would bolt at any second. Dalton circled around to stand next to the front entrance. Seifert put his hand on his blaster once again. "Talon Karrde, I need an answer." "Uh... can you just put down something for me? I'd rather keep my reasons to myself." "Personal reasons? I'm sorry, but that won't look good. I'm afraid we'll need more than that." Karrdes resolution seemed to snap in an instance and he slumped in his chair, looking at his boots. "I might as well tell you. She'll probably be here any second, in any case. Promise me you'll protect me from her?" Dalton stared at the man, obviously dumbfounded, but Karrde didn't turn to look at him. Seifert hid his confusion and nodded. "Well, it all started the other day..." ----- *It was about a standard month ago. Yes. That's it. I had been in the tapcafe waiting for my girlfriend at our usual spot at the bar, when another woman-- truly a _stunning_ woman--came up and sat next to me at my girlfriends usual spot...* Talon turned to face the empty seat on the opposite side of him from the beautiful woman. He felt a light tap on his shoulder, but ignored it. He felt a second tap, harder this time, but tried his hardest not to acknowledge it in any way. "Another lum, bartender," he said. "I think you've had your limit, Karrde." said the Quarren from his possition behind the bar. Thinking he would prove his soberness, Karrde unleashed some of his toughest tounge twisters, ones no drunk being could ever hope to emulate. "The Leith police dismisseth us. Sister Suzie's sewing shirts for soldiers..." "Karrde, I've seen you--flat drunk--balance a chopstick on your left index finger while typing your name backward on a datapad with your right hand. I know when you are drunk." "Fine. Give me a water with ice, then." Just then, the hand that had been tapping his shoulder grabbed it and spun him around on the stool. At the same time as his girlfriend entered from the doorway and screamed "Talon! Get away from her!" *That night she dragged me home and yelled at me like no Sith could ever hope to be that mean. I tried to explain I didn't know the woman, but she wouldn't believe me.* The next night--paycheck night, when the tapcafe was always full--Talon managed to squeeze into his usual spot, with the seats on either side of him full. He turned and saw his girlfriend walking down the steps from the front entrance towards him. In that same instant, the woman from the night before walked up from behind him, goosing his bum on the way by. "_Talon_!!" *I hadn't thought she could have been meaner than the night before. When her back was turned, thinking fast, I ran upstairs and grabbed a diamond I had found in the mines where I work. When she came up to find me, I proposed to her on the spot. She instantly seemed to forget about both incidents. That night was much, _much_ better than the last.* The night after that, all the regulars who hadn't already spent all of their paycheck were back. The bar was full, but the rest of the tapcafe was nearly open, Talon took a seat at one of the tables to wait. As his girlfri... er... _fiance_ came to sit down, the same woman from the past two nights walked up to Talon and kissed him full on--more of in, than on--the mouth. "TALON!!!" *My ex-fiance's eyes flared--I swear they started glowing red--and I ran out of there as fast as I could. I came here, in hopes of getting off planet before she comes and murders me. I know she'll do it! She's so mad at me! We'll never get married now...* ----- When the story was finished, Seifert glanced at his hands that were now clenched tightly around his stylus. Dalton had long since lowered the gun and started watching the doorway to make sure no screaming women came running in with a force-pike at the ready. A screaming woman came running in with a force-pike at the ready. Dalton leapt to his feat, Seifert stood slowly while raising his blaster, and Karrde lept over Seiferts desk and then scampered under it. When the woman saw the two blasters pointed at her, she came to a halt, only a meter from jabbing the pike through the chair Karrde had been sitting in. Through clenched teeth, the muscles in her jaw rippling with anger, she stated plainly and coldly, "I wish to see my future husband. NOW!!!" "I'm sorry. We can't let you do that. Please leave the premises. And you may leave the force- pike with us, so we may dispose of it properly." The woman glared at Seifert for a minute. Then, with presice accuracy, she hurled the pike by Seifert's head, clipping his ear, and lodging it in the wall behind him. Then she turned on the balls of her feet and walked--or stomped, rather--out the front entrance. "I won't press charges for nearly killing me with the pike," Seifert said to the already closing door. "S-s-see what I mean," came a slight whimpering from beneath the desk. "You can come out now. We'll keep you in protective custody until the supply ship comes and you can hitch a ride with them." "Can't you give me a ride to Carida or wherever," Karrde said as he eased himself out from beneath the desk. "I thought you had a Ghrtoc freighter or something." "Sorry, but no. Our _Unreliable_ is only for in-system travel. We had to sell the hyperdrive to some mad scientist in order to increase our funding. Did you know, we haven't gotten a raise here since we opened the recruiting office?" "Well what about the spare?" Karrde plopped himself, totally drained of energy, into the chair that now had a slight tear in the fabric on the back of it. "You haven't flown a ship in quite some time, have you? Spare hyperdrives are for emergencies. They are clocked at 10 times slower than lightspeed. It'd take us a week to get to the next colonized planet. And then you'd have to hitch a ride out of Mos Eisley with one of the spice smugglers. Do you know how much that would cost?" "Humph. I guess I could stay with you for a while. When does the next supply ship come in?" "Depends on if the pirates hijack it or not. Could be tomorrow, could be next month." "I have to live with you for a month?!" "Both of us. The Empire is kinda stingy when it rents apartments for it's recruiters. We share one. Only two bedrooms, so you can have the couch." "Oh, no. I think I'd rather take my chances with her..." ***** Chap 4 - The Scientist ***** "My nerf steak is delicious! You two really ought to have some." "You poor fool, Dalton. Have you ever seen the kitchens here?" asked Seifert. "No." "And I don't think you want to," added Talon Karrde. "Myrec Halston, the ex-health inspector? Didn't you ever wonder why he retired early? It was the kitchens here." put in Seifert. "Ech! I think I've eaten enough." "I think so, too. I'm even getting sick." "So, I guess I'll be visiting the 'fresher, now." "My thoughts exactly." "And I'll pick up the check," said Talon. "You two've been housing me for a while It's the least I can do." "That's the only thing you've done. Besides, the next supply ship will probably come in. Don't worry." "That's what you said a week ago." ----- Talon and Seifert waited outside for Dalton to return. When he did, he didn't look better than he had before. "Hey, Dalton. You still look a bit green around the gills. You okay?" inquired Talon. "Just before I turned on the waste disposal unit, I could swear I saw something move." "Thanks for sharing." Seifert gave a shudder and turned to walk back to the apartment. A hunchback humanoid squinted back at him from only a few meters away. Or, rather, one eye squinted. The other was wide with a vertical slit for a pupil, reminding Seifert of several feline species. "Commander Seifert?" the odd man asked. "Uh, it's 'Captain', but yes. What can I do for you?" "Message from Master Yates." The man handed him a datapad disc. Seifert turned to his companions. "Yates... Yates... Why does that name sound familiar?" "Wasn't he the wacko that built his house in the swamp west of town?" "Oh, yeah." Seifert turned back to the hunchback, but was surprised to find him gone. ----- Seifert rang the call button next to the huge doors. No sooner had the chime finished it's musical tone, but a two-thirds sized holoimage of the hunchback appeared between the trio and the huge house. "You rang?" the man rasped. "We're here. No weapons, like the message said. The holo disappeared as the door opened. "Walk this way," the man said as he poked his face out of the gloom. The group followed him through foyer, down two flights of stairs and around a corner. As they rounded the corner, they noticed he had disappeared, leaving them in total darkness. Total darkness, except a yellow triangle, dimly illuminated on the floor. "Think it points the correct direction?" "What else would it point?" Seifert could hear the footsteps of the other two as they passed over the triangle, turning in the direction it indicated. As they passed over it, it disappeared while another replaced it a few meters ahead of them. When they finally came out of the dark maze, they realized they had entered a place right out of a cheap holo-horror. Strange equipment filled the room, from a Tesla coil, right down to twin Jacob's Ladders. In the middle of the room was a hyperdrive unit where the letters "U N R E L I A B L E" could be seen to have been removed. Several boxy attachments had been added, and quite a few wires ran from it to wall sockets, computer control units, and quite a few other strange objects. Standing on a ladder that was leaning against the ex-hyperdrive, was Yates himself. He was working inside one of the attachments. Every now and then, blue sparks would erupt from the box in which his hands were burried, illuminating his lead apron and goggles. "Mr. Yates?" The man leapt in surprise. His landing on the ladder disloged the base, which slid out from the unit, while the top of the ladder slid down the side of the hyperdrive. Only centimeters from crashing into the ground, the man jumped off and landed unscathed, on his feet. "Ah! Captain Seifert. I know who your your assistant is, but who is this other person?" "I'm Talon Karrde. I'm with him." He jabbed his thumb at Seifert. "Well, the more the merrier. You're probably all wondering what this contraption is, eh?" He made a vague gesture indicating the hyperdrive. "Well, just let me finish this one last modification, and I'll show you." He set the ladder upright again, and climbed to the top. With one gloved hand, he extracted the tool he had been using, and closed the panel with the other. After putting the ladder and tool away, he doffed his apron, goggles, and gloves, only to don a white lab coat. "I had a theory. You know how a hyperdrive works, and the suspicions we scientists have about hyperspace being a seperate dimension? Well, you also must know that if a person were to eject out of a ship in hyperspace, or if something not equipped with a hyperdrive were to seperate from the ship, it will disappear, most likely lost forever? And if a hyperdrive were shut off, the ship would drop out of hyperspace, correct? I believe this device has opened a portal into hyperspace that will allow a person to walk, fly, or whatever through hyperspace without fear of being trapped there, as long as this device remains operational." "You're free to your own imaginings. But I still don't see what this has to do with us." Seifert stated. "Well I figured that only Imperials would be brave enough to try it." "Do you have a permit for human testing? Do you have the insurance we won't be instantly driven mad inside hyperspace? Do you have the insurance we won't die?" "In that case, only Imperials have the courage to run the machinery while _I_ test it." "Fine by me. Show us how to run it." ----- After a crash course in running the machinery, Yates was ready to enter. He had chosen to leave the lab coat where it belonged, in the lab, and instead worn a simple tunic and trousers with a utility belt filled with emergency objects. Because he was the only one that actually knew how to turn the portal on, he had the three stand aside as he flicked several switches. Instantly, a portal opened mere centimeters from Dalton's nose. Out of surprise, he fell backward into a table, spilling several liquids onto his hair. "You sure you want to do this, Yates?" Seifert yelled above the din of a rush of air. "Of course!" Yates yelled back. "I'm fine! Don't worry about me!" yelled Dalton in anger. He and Karrde took their places while Seifert stood aside to help Yates into the portal. Yates stepped into the swirling, mottled blue, and was gone. "Turn it off!" yelled Seifert. "What?! Are you mad?" Karrde yelled in response. "No. He is. Do it and I'll explain." "Master! No!" The hunchback came scurrying out from his hiding place, a blaster rifle poised. He stood with his back to the portal. Slowly, he backed up. And then, he, too, was gone. The portal disappeared the instant the hunchback was gone, leaving the very tip of the rifle poking out through the portal. It landed, smoking on the floor. "So, why did we just commit murder by leaving them there?" Dalton asked, just as Seifert noticed his hair was being bleached by whatever was spilled on it. "You know as well as I do that every person recovered from hull work on a ship in hyperspace has been psychotic, some even homicidal." "That doesn't mean it's justified." said Talon, from his possition at one of the controls. "No, but listen to the rest of my reasons. Every ammount of mass will cast a mass-shadow in hyperspace. It would appear as a dark blotch, in the vauge shape of whatever in realspace was casting the shadow. There was no mass- shadow of the planet there." "So, what are you saying?" "Before I say it, remember that we gave Yates plenty of chances to not go through the portal. His gofer was following him. So, Yates basically committed suicide." ***** Chapter 5 - Part 1/3 of Sheppard's Birthday Special - The Admiral ***** In a laboratory buried deep within the city-planet of Imperial Center, a scientist worked diligently to find that which his employer sought. As he inserted another gas survey sample into one of his many machines, he was rewarded with the green light he had been waiting for. As the display read out the exact contents of the sample container, he was surprised at the ammount of the substance he had been looking for. _Perhaps the admiral will pay me a bonus for finding a planet so abundant with the stuff_, he thought while establishing a connection to the star destroyer waiting in orbit. "I've found it!" he blurted to the hologram image of the admiral. "On a backwater planet in the Ysoff System." "Ysoff? Never heard of it." grunted the admiral while fiddling with something off screen. "It would make sense that you haven't. It's a border world, near the Unknown Regions." replied the scientist. "I was wondering... uh... seeing as I found it and all... could I have a bonus?" the scientist finally got the words out. "Hmm?" The admiral turned back to the scientist. "Sure, sure. I'll send some men down to handle the transaction face-to-face." "Oh, thank you, sir! And if you ever need my assistance again, I'll be right here.", the scientist said to the empty space where the hologram had been. He smiled to himself and turned to await the admiral's men. ----- Admiral Mark Sheppard motioned to one of his stormtrooper captains. "I'd like you to pay the scientist... pay him with the same substance he found for us", the admiral said to the captain. "Yessir." The admiral could almost hear the grin from beneath the faceplate. "Will this be a suicide, murder, or straight-forward execution?" "Whichever you deem necessary. But bring his equipment back with you; I don't want anyone to find what we have found. As the trooper left the bridge to gather his squad, the admiral turned back to the datapad he had been typing on. It displayed the common information about the planet: capital city, ruling official, location. One entry interested him, however: Galactic Empire Presence: Imperial Recruiter, Capt. Seifert Assistant Recruiter, Private Rob Dalton ----- Dalton stared blankly at himself in the mirror. He reached a hand up and ran his fingers through his hair, completly dumbfounded at what he saw. He turned to Talon Karrde. Karrde was just then waking up and stretching while he walked down the short hallway from the main room of the apartment, past the two bedrooms, and to the small refresher station where Dalton stood in front of the mirror. "Think anyone will notice?" Dalton asked, indicating his hair. Karrde took a moment to yawn, then saw what Dalton was talking about. When he did, he put both hands up to his eyes and rubbe them to clear the blurriness of sleep. "Tell me, did I wake up, or is this some highly comical dream?" "I didn't think it was that funny at all. I mean, what are the chances that I would stumble and fall into some chemical that Dr. Yates just happens to keep in an open container? And then, what are the chances that this random chemical is a very effecient bleaching agent?" Just then, Seifert came to use the 'fresher. He glanced at Dalton's bone-white hair, blinked twice, shrugged, and edged past Dalton to use the 'fresher. "A little privacy please?" were the only words he spoke as he shooed the other two out and closed the door. ----- An hour later, Dalton and Karrde met Seifert at the Imperial Recruiter's office. The small plaza out front was still devoid of pedestrians and hover vehicles, being fairly early in the morning. "What's on the agenda for today, boss?" asked Karrde. "Considering I'm not your boss, whatever you like. Of course, if you leave, you take the risk of running into your ex-girlfriend." "Where in the kriff did she ever get a force- pike, anyhow? I thought those things were restricted." put in Dalton. "Do I look like the Emporer? Am I nearly omniscient? How do you expect me to know?" said Karrde, obviously highly agitated at the mention of his ex- girlfriend. "Well, wherever she got it, it's ours now. And who's going to take it away from us?" asked Dalton. "The Baron Administrator could," said Seifert. "Why would he want to? What would he do with it?" Seifert merely shrugged. "All I said was that he -could-." "Well, let's get down to work. What work needs to be done today?" "Sleep, hopefully. Maybe watch some holo-net?" said Karrde jokingly. "Actually, we've gotten all of our mandatory forms filled out. I think we could afford a few minutes sleep." said Seifert. And with that said, he put both feet up on his near-empty desk and tilted his hat forward over his eyes. ----- Out in the dead of space, only three things were visible as more than pinpricks of light. A single planet was the, from this perspective, the largest of all the three. The sun this planet orbited was the true largest. And then there was a small object, at least in comparison to the other behemoth stellar bodies. It had a wedge shape on the front, attached by a stubby neck to a blocky object. Three flat "wings" extended out from the central object. It was moving towards the planet, now recognizable as Ysoff I. The odd object reached the atmosphere and continued downward, headed towards the most populated of all the cities on the planet. ----- Seifert had just drifted off to sleep when he was awoken by Dalton. "I think you better here this. Kynes, the guy from the spaceport watch tower, just called. He needs to speak with you." Grudgingly and grumbling all the way, Seifert got up and walked over to the small comm terminal that was affixed to one wall. "Can't you see some people have to sleep? What do you want?" "Well, sir... Uh... We got visitors. From out of town." said Kynes, the spaceport attendant. Technically, the Ysoff I spaceport needed no sentient beings. It was all run by droids, due to the low ammount of traffic. "Who are they, and why is it absolutely vital that I know about it?" growled Seifert sarcastically. "The ship is an Imperial shuttle. And it's landing in the plaza outside your office." Kynes went on. "The occupant is one Admiral Sheppard. He says he wishes to speak with you as soon as he lands." "Great. An Imperial Admiral wants to speak with me. What a way to ruin a perfectly good, lazy day." Seifert said as he switched off the comm. "Probably more paperwork." ----- Seifert watched as the Lambda-class shuttle landed in the plaza, the side wings folding to a verticle possition. The landing struts came down on the fusion-formed plaza. Seifert could see the pilot running through the disengauge sequence through the forward viewport, as the boarding ramp came down. With two stormtroopers flanking him, and undoubtedly the rest of the squad stil onboard in case of emergency, a man in full Imperial Admiral's uniform stepped out. Seifert and Dalton saluted, with Karrde catching on and giving a half- practiced salute. The admiral returned the salute and gestured towards the office. "Shall we?" Seifert preceded the group with Dalton and Karrde behind and to either side of him. Then came the admiral and his stormtroopers. Seifert stood behind the desk, and waited for the admiral to take his seat, a sign of respect. Seifert sat, followed quickly by Dalton and Karrde. The stormtroopers remained standing. "It's nice to meet you, Capt. Seifert", began the admiral. "Likewise, Admiral, despite the unexpected visit." "Well, I suppose we ought to get straight to the point. Recently was the aniversary of my promotion to the rank of Admiral. The Emporer, in his infinite wisdom, decided to reward me for my years of loyal service to the Empire. My reward? Any planet not currently occupied by the Empire." "Permission to speak freely, Admiral?" At a nod, Seifert continued. "So what, precisely, does this have to do with me?" "Well, I have decided to accept this planet, Ysoff I. And because I wouldn't want to put you out, how would you like a possition as Garrison Commander?" "Well, I'd like to see how things begin to turn out before I accept. Give me a while to make my decision, please." "Of course." "By the way, how are you going to break the news to the Baron Administrator that he's out of a job?" asked Karrde. "Don't worry about him. I'll find ways of making him see the wisdom of having me ruling the planet." The admiral got up to leave. "But before I go," he pointed at Dalton's white hair, "Do I dare ask?" Seifert chuckled and stood to salute, forestalling any further comment. After he was finished, he pointed out the window to the small crowd that was gathering. "It looks like the Baron Administrator is here to greet you." Seifert walked with the admiral and his stormtroopers to the door. Outside, he watched the Baron Administrator and the admiral climb into a groundcar and begin to pull away. ----- "Grand Admiral Sheppard!" Baron Administrator Kenneth von Lowe intentionally exagerated the admiral's rank. "So good to have you on our fair planet." "It's Admiral" was Sheppard's only reply. "Yes, yes. Of course." Lowe continued excitedly, still attempting to flatter the admiral to get on good standings. "Would you like a tour guide to show you some of the attractions? I could hire a knowledgable one. Or perhaps you require the services of, shall we say, another type of -escort- to show you... other attractions?" The admiral spitted the now squirming man with a glare. "Of course not!" The Baron fell all over himself trying to flatter the admiral. "What a funny joke, eh?" he asked, hoping to cover his mistake. "I'll take you to the hotel. I had the Imperial Suite prepared for you. We can conduct our business tomorrow morning." ----- The admiral frowned at his surroundings. _At least everything -else- is proceeding according to plan_. The dingy hotel room was apparently the best that could be found on the planet. _Oh well. At least my Star Destroyer will arrive tomorrow morning on schedule. The I won't have to stay in this terrible room._ ***** ***** Chapter 6 - Part 2/3 of Sheppard's Birthday Specail - Discovery ***** Through the dark of night Dalton watched. Being a cloudy night, not even the stars added their light to the motely array of street lights and bright signs that populated the capital city of Ysoff I. "500,000 independent colonists. All soon to be citizens of the Empire." said Seifert who was standing next to him at the window. "What a shame." The apartment lights were out so they could see the street and all the people on it better. "But I thought -we- worked for the glory of the Empire, just as much as Adm. Sheppard." said Dalton inquisitively. "Oh, we do. But what Sheppard is trying to do is not glorifying, at least not to the Empire. He is increasing his wealth and power at the expense of 500,000 hapless individuals who have no say in the matter, whatsoever." "I see what you mean, and I take it you intend to confront him about it?" "Confront him, no. At least not directly. If I did that, he would continue with his plans and remove me from a possition of responsibility, permanently if you catch my meaning." "But we're still going to stop him?" "Oh, most assuredly. This is where you come in, at least for the first stage of my plan." "Me? What could I possibly do?" "Think, Dalton. What was your job before you came to work for me?" "A thief. And a pretty good one, if you ask me." "I didn't ask you, but yes. You are a decent thief. And now is your first chance in a while to utilize those skills. You've been keeping practice, I trust?" Dalton grinned, and that was all Seifert needed to know. "Good. I had expected that. What we need stolen is merely information. I hope your slicing skills are up to par. At any rate, we need to find out -why- Adm. Sheppard wants Ysoff I." "It can't be the quality of the food." Dalton said, recalling a certain nerf steak he had once eaten. ----- An hour later, Dalton was in an alley behind the hotel where the admiral was staying. Fully bedecked in a stormtrooper's black body glove he had obtained when he first started thieving, Dalton surveyed the situation. He looked above to find the fire escape ladder, but saw that it was just out of reach. Thinking quickly, he grabbed a waste recepticle to climb on top of to reach the ladder. Just as he set it down, a felinx jumped out of the recepticle, and startled him. In the ensuing ruckus, Dalton made enough noise to wake the rest of the city, adding in the occasional curse or expletive to make sure even the heavy sleepers were awoken. ----- Lt. Hit-man had been in Admiral Sheppard's stormtrooper forces since he finished training on Carida, only several months before. During his first battle, Hit-man's entire squad was slaughtered, but Hit-man continued to battle and claimed victory over the remaining five Rebel troopers. Because of his bravery, courage, and ferocity, he was transferred to Admiral Sheppard's Elite Squad. He had never asked what happened to the previous stormtrooper he had replaced in Elite Squad, but had heard something about a scientist and an unexpected hold- out blaster. Because he had only been with the squad since just before they departed on this mission, he had yet to proove himself to the other squad members. When he heard the noise coming from the nearby alley, he figured it would be his chance to catch a saboteur or assassin or some other threat to the admiral's life. He stepped up to the corner and double-checked the charge on his blaster rifle. He rounded the corner with his blaster at the ready and saw... a mangy alley-felinx. It hissed at him. _What the kriff? How could such a small animal make that much noise?_ He stood from the crouching possition he had automatically assumed and glanced around. Without warning, he could feel a slight pressure on the top of his helmet. Looking up to see what was causing the sensation, he saw only a bootsole rushing at his faceplate, then stars of pain, and finally darkness. ----- Rob dropped down from where he had been hanging on the bottom rung of the fire escape ladder. He took off the stormtrooper's helmet and was startled to find the red glow of a cybernetic eye. He checked for a pulse, and when he found the stormtrooper alive, dgragged him out of sight behind one of the recepticles. Taking the blaster rifle, he set it to -stun- and low power to keep the noise down, and pumped a shot into the trooper to keep him out of the game, at least for now. Setting the trash recepticle upright, Rob scrambled up to the roof. He placed a fusion-anchor in place, and fed a climbing rope through the loop. Silently lowering himself, he stopped at the admiral's window and opened it without a sound. Easing through the window into the main room, he sat silently for a moment and listened for snoring from the bedroom. After a while, he decided the admiral was asleep. He tip-toed over to the datapad on the desk and flicked it on. He inserted a specialized datadisk. Where a normal datadisk would slip into the dataport all the way, this disk had several wires bundled into a cord, traling from it. The wires were plugged into Dalton's palm-sized datapad. After a minute, the smaller datapad had found and cracked all the passwords and encryptions on the admiral's datapad. Dalton ran a serch on the larger datapad for anything pertaining to "Ysoff I" . Several files popped up. Dalton glanced over their titles to see if he could glean any important information. One file surprised him, but he didn't want to spare the time to read it. He unplugged the wires from the small datapad and plugged them into a miniturized holonet broadcaster. When all seven files had been uploaded to the computer back at the office, he ejected the special disk and hit the power button on the larger datapad. Dalton hadn't noticed that the admiral's datapad had a voice synthesizer. "Good bye!" said the datapad. Despite it being at normal conversational volume, the one little phrase seemed to be louder than the roar of an ion engine. Dalton took a running leap out the window, catching the climbing rope in one hand. The rope, being anchored to the roof, swung him around to the window of the guest room next to the Imperial Suite. Talking a glance to make sure noone inside saw him, he climbed back to the roof and unhooked the rope from the anchor. Not wanting to waste any time, Dalton slid down the fire escape ladder of the fire escape. After a second of self-debate, he went to check the downed stormtrooper. Finding him still out, Dalton put a few more stun-bolts into him. _That ought to keep him out till noon._ Taking a glance around the corner, Dalton began walking back to the office to read the files. ***** ***** Chapter 7 - Part 3/3 of Sheppard's Birthday Specail - Exodus ***** It was still forty minutes till planetary noon. Another hour after that, and it would be Galactic Standard noon. Seifert and Karrde were in the speeder with Dalton at the wheel, on their way back from where they had been since sunrise. "So Karrde, are you trying to impress the admiral, or scare him away?" said Dalton between chuckles. "Shut up." Karrde's glare was evident, even through the caked-on muck. "Would you two please take a break from your bickering? At least you weren't so busy as to not help me." Seifert finished removing both rubber boots he had worn into the swamp, and finished lacing up his regular uniform boots. "Well, if Karrde hadn't found that sink-hole, I wouldn't have anything to laugh at." Seifert chuckled at that, remembering the events that had led up to the funny sight... ----- "How many explosive charges do we need to plant?" called Dalton from several meters away. "Shouldn't need too many. I don't think it will take too much energy to start the reaction." replied Seifert as he set another charge. Karrde came wading through the muck to Seifert. "My charges are all planted. What next?" "Have you planted any in that area?" Seifert pointed. "Nope. I just did over there." Karrde pointed in another direction. "Well, take these five and go put them over there." Seifert took five charges out of his haversack and handed them to Karrde and turned back to what he was doing. A minute later, Seifert and Dalton heard Karrde scream. "Help!" Seifert dropped the charge he had been setting and ran over to see what was the matter. When he got there, he saw Dalton, but no trace of Karrde. "Where is he?" Just as the last word escaped his mouth, something in the mud moved. Dalton pointed at it, and reached for a long stick to reach out to it. When he pulled the stick back out of the muck, a hand came with it. And attached to that hand was an arm. On the other end of that arm was the rest of a very muddy Talon Karrde. Choking and sputtering, Karrde was dragged to dry ground, or the nearest thing available in a swamp. "Hey, Karrde. Did you have a nice mud bath?" giggled Dalton. Karrde merely glared and used one hand to wipe a layer of muck from his face. He looked at the handfull of sticky goo, smiled, and splattered it on Dalton's shirt. "Come on, you two. I think I have some plastic in the landspeeder that Karrde can sit on for the ride back to town." He glanced at his wrist-chrono. "We've still got a while, so Karrde can shower and get clean clothes." ----- Seifert smiled as he remembered the last details. They were now back in the appartment. He looked again at his wristchrono. Still another 10 minutes or so, then they would have to go to the Baron Administrator's office. ----- "So what you're saying is that if I agree to let you have Ysoff I as your planet, you would make me the Baron Administrator over the entire system?" asked Kenneth von Lowe. He liked that idea. "That is correct." stated Admiral Mark Sheppard, as if the concept were an every day occurance. "Hmm... I don't see any difference, though. Ysoff I is the only colonized planet." said Lowe rather dubiously. "More Imperial citizens would be brought in. My fleet will be based out of the Ysoff system, so their families would want to move to this system. I also have no doubt that useful minerals will be discovered on the other planets, so mining colonies will have to be established." "Sounds reasonable. One final question before I agree. Why this planet? Why Ysoff I?" Just as those words left his mouth, the door slammed open and entered Imperial Recruiter Captain Seifert, his entourage of two, and the Baron's assistant, Alex Sutton, trying to stop the other three from interupting the important meeting. "Tibanna gas." said Seifert. "That's why the admiral wants Ysoff I. He wants the Tibanna gas." Sutton stopped speaking in mid-sentence leaving his mouth hanging open. "Tibanna gas?! The stuff they use in blasters? A person could make a fortune selling the stuff..." "Precisely." said the admiral. He made a small motion with his hand, and the stormtrooper honor guard brought their blaster rifles to bear on the Baron Administrator and the four newcomers. "A scientist I had hired for this specific job discovered that the swamp outside of town produces Tibanna gas as a natural waste product and expels it into the atmosphere. An unexplained, but highly profitable phenomenon. "I had originally planned to take the planet without force--I would need the population with high morale to work in the packaging factories--but now it would appear you five are about to have an unfortunate accident." "Oh, are we?" Seifert asked sarcastically as he stepped forward, totally ignoring the stormtroopers who turned their full attention--and subsequently, their blaster rifles--towards him. "I once read a book,--" "Only once?" The remark Karrde had intended to bring laughter and lighten the mood only brought a poke with a blaster muzzle to the back of his head. Seifert continued "--and the moral of the book was that 'he who has the power to destroy something, controls it'." "Very true and well put, but I don't see how it helps you in this situation." said Sheppard. The look in his eyes and the beads of sweat at his temples betrayed the fact that he did see exactly what Seifert meant. Seifert took something from his pocket. Sheppards eyes went wide as his fears were confirmed. He reckognized the device as a remote detonator. His speach stayed calm and collected. "A blaster bolt would cut you down before you could use that." "That's why they call it a deadman's switch." Seifert said as he flicked a switch and held down a button. The stormtroopers, unsure of whether to blast him or surrender, let their resolution waver and blaster muzzles turn to the ground. Resignation was plain on the admiral's face when he said "You wouldn't." In a moment of inspiration, he came up with a last ditch effort. "The backwash of a Tibanna reaction that large could possibly melt the crust of this entire continent. It would Base Delta Zero half of the planet!" The Baron, previously sure the admiral, then Seifert, would prevail, now lacked certantity in either. He looked between the two, and finally decided on Seifert. "True, but it would destroy the Tibanna gas and the threat to the people, you." Admitting defeat, the admiral slumped his shoulders. "What do you want of me?" "Simple. Leave the planet in under"--he glanced at his wrist chrono--"five standard minutes from now." "But one of my troopers is missing." "In that case, ten minutes." "We'll never find him in that much time!" "9 minutes, 30 seconds. Get searching. The chrono is ticking, Admiral." The admiral stomped out, fuming, followed by his stormtrooper squad minus one. "Baron, we have much to discuss, but not now. Admiral Sheppard still poses a threat that I will deal with in a few minutes. Until then, I'll keep this"--he indicated the detonator--"safely with me." Seifert turned and left, followed by his own entourage. Sutton looked to the Baron, shrugged, and went back to his desk, closing the office doors behind him. The Baron, totally dumbfounded at what had just transpired. Blinked several times. When realization of what Seifert had just said finally set in, Lowe realized that Admiral Sheppard could still kill the inhabitants of the colony. Lowe sat in coushy chair, numbly wondering what to do in what was possibly the last few moments of his life. He looked over his desk, found the paper he had most recently been working on, and continued filling it out. ----- Seifert arrived at the office and turned the holocom on. After a few seconds, he had roused Kynes, the spaceport attendant. "Kynes. Give me the view from the near-space sensor net." Kynes nodded and his image was replaced with a sphere. A blinking point moved away from the sphere. "Can you give me a real-video closeup of the shuttle?" Seifert said to the reciever. Once again, the image was replaced by another. This time, only a miniature shuttle, about the size of Seifert's thumb appeared. "That's all the closer I can get. Nearest sensor unit is several thousand kilometers from the shuttle, and this is maximum zoom." said Kynes' voice. "That's fine. I'm afraid that something else will be filling up the screne soon, anyway." said Seifert. Within seconds, Seifert's prediction rang true as an Imperial Star Destroyer came out of hyperspace nearby. The ship came out just above the plane of view of the camera, showing it's underside. The point appeared first, moving at a good speed, and soon the entire belly of the massive ship was visible. Seeing the tremendous war machine filled Seifert with a sense of pride for the Empire. The Star Destroyer was fast becoming more a symbol of law and order to Imperial citizens, rather than what it was designed for. A second feeling came to Seifert, more of dread and disdain, when the sensors tagged the ship as the Buchanan, the flag ship of of Admiral Sheppard's fleet. Within minutes, Sheppard was at the bridge of his pride and joy, the Buchanan. "Gunners, prepare for a Base Delta Zero on the planet Ysoff I. Pilots, bring the ship to a low orbit to complete the task." Sheppard smiled when it came time for him to say the line he so loved. "You may fire when ready." His clipped, Imperial tones and accent turned the short phrase into an eloquent statement, albeit one that could start or finish wars. Indecision came to Sheppard, and he said, "Cancel that. Comm officer, open a chanel to the Imperial Recruiter's office in the capital city." Seifert had been less than patiently awaiting the comm call. "What took you so long? I thought you'd like to gloat as soon as you arrived on the bridge." "I'm already going to eliminate the colony. Don't make it any worse than it already is." said Admiral Sheppard. "Any worse? How could it possibly be any worse?*" Seifert said, half mockingly. "I'm not that stupid, Sheppard. The worst you can do is kill me, and a turbolaser bolt would vaporize my neurons before I could feel the pain." ***** Writer's note: * Yes. This is a shameless ripoff from "The Life of Brian". Tell me if I worded it incorrectly, hmm? ***** Sheppard's wicked grin turned to a glare of rage. He turned away from the holocam and said "Gunners, prepare to fire on my mark. And--" "What did you do?" Seifert interrupted. "What? What are you talking about?" The admiral looked extremely confused. "It's a simple question, Admiral. What... did... you... do?" "I don't understand. What did I do when, how, to whom?" "Oh, come on, Admiral. I can't believe you got to the rank of Admiral without the brains to see what's going on." "I demand you tell me what the kriff you are talking about!!!" The admiral was clearly getting agitated, and spittle flew as he barked the words. "Well, if you can't figure it out, let me explain it to you. Now think logically, here. The Emporer promised you any planet not currently occupied by the Empire, correct? But the only unoccupied planets are out in the rim. Which means..." "Which means the Emporer was trying to get rid of me." Realization of what was going on set in. Anger was still evident, but no longer directed at Seifert. "Probably as a punishment. Which leads to the question, what did you do?" Puzzlement and rage were evident on Sheppard's face and he stammered, "I... I don't know. But I'll find out!" He turned away again. "Navigation, prepare a hyperspace course to Coruscant!" He turned back to Seifert. "I'll deal with you when I get back, Captain Seifert!" The comm went blank and Seifert switched back to the sensor view that had been on hold. Within seconds, the Buchanan dissapeared into hyperspace. "That was certainly fun. Anyone want some lunch?" asked Seifert. ***** ***** Chapter 8 - The Lieutenant ***** Seifert and his dual entorauge entered the fast food restaurant only half an hour after Admiral Sheppard's Buchanan had left orbit. Seifert ordered last and received his mid-day meal which consisted of the restaurant's novelty salad in which the dressing would be mixxed and the entire salad shaken to mix the contents. He joined his friends at a booth, sitting down next to Dalton. He began to shake the salad container in one hand while drinking with his other hand. After a while, in mid-shake, the lid popped off the container, exploding salad over both Dalton and Seifert. Karrde found this extremely funny and burst out laughing, while Dalton wiped a leafy green from his face and frowned. Seifert sat, silently fuming at the loss of his salad and the credits paid for it, and found it pertinent for Karrde to cease his chortling. Karrde bent over clutching his left shoulder. His squeal of pain pacified Seifert's anger and unclenched Seifert's fist. Dalton smiled while he cleaned up the mess of vegetables on his lap. ----- An hour later found Seifert and his cohorts walking past the hotel where the admiral had spend the previous night. As they passed by, a stormtrooper stumbled groggily out of a nearby alley. He glanced around and seemed to recognize Seifert. He tried his best to march towards Seifert, but stumbled several times. Finally, he was able to stand in front of Seifert and salute. "Lt. Hit-man reporting." His voice was gruff, but it lacked the distortion of a normal stormtrooper, due to the lack of a helmet. He carried no weapon, and didn't seem to know what to do with the hand that would normally hold a rifle. Seifert saluted back. "You're Admiral Sheppard's missing stormtrooper, I would imagine. Would you like to hear what happened to Sheppard?" The stormtrooper seemed to be fully awake now, and stood at attention. "Yessir!" "Don't bother to stand at attention, lieutenant. On a world this far from the Core, Imperial regulations are lax and the chance of a reprimand is zilch. Let's go back to my office, and I'll fill you in about the admiral." Probably out of habit, the stormtrooper fell into lockstep with Seifert while he was brought up to date on the recent happenings. ----- "So Admiral Sheppard is gone? Good. Never really like him." "How so?" inquired Karrde. "Well, I don't respond well to authority. That, coupled with the fact that Sheppard sometimes made rookie mistakes or blunders." "Any of them big enough to get 'special attention' from the Emporer?" asked Seifert. "I suppose. Once or twice, the ship would receive an urgent call from Imperial Centre, and the admiral would come out of the comm room looking like he had seen a ghost. He would tug at his uniform collar, too." "Well, I've got to ask you out of curiousity, how the kriff did one of the admiral's elite stormtroopers manage to get knocked out and left behind?" Something between rage and embarassment came over the heavily scarred, still organic half of Hit-man's face. "It was a dirty trick! They jumped me in a dark alley. There had to be at least ten of them!" Dalton nodded, barely able to contain his laugher, as if in encouragement of Hit-man's embellishment. After his narrative was over, nearly 20 standard minutes later, Hit-man finished with "...and if I ever find them, I'll kill them in excruciatingly painful ways!" Hit-man said this with such vehemence, Dalton took a step back, eyes wide in horror of the possible impending doom. Karrde gave him a knowing wink and a sly smile. "Isn't that nice?" Seifert joked. He glanced at Dalton and also gave him an evil grin. He looked back to Hit-man. "Well. Now you've got a choice. You can wait for the next supply ship, like Karrde here, and leave this Core-forgotten rock. Or, you can hang around and see what a fun place Ysoff I can be." "Depends, really. I think I'll just wait and see." ----- Deep in the swamp, near the capital of Ysoff I, an old mansion from the pre- colonization days was slowly being reclaimed by the surrounding flora and fauna. Vines had covered the walls, and the wooden door had begun to rot with the rains and humid air of the swamp. The prefab duracrete walls were slowly being eroded, but deep in the warrens of the various sub-basement layers, strange activity was taking place. In the deepest of the sub-basement levels was the laboratory. White sheets now covered all of the machinery. Seifert, Dalton, and Karrde, who had been the last to leave the old mansion, had found the sheets in an upstairs closet. They had shut down all of the machines, then covered them with sheets to keep the dust off. Without warning, a blue disk appeared with a loud "pop" of displaced air, startling several large rodents. The disk was actually a gateway to someplace extremely far away. As the pressure on either side of the gateway equalized, a rush of air sucked away the built-up dust and arachnid webs. After the rush of air subsided, a lone rodent sat on its haunches watching the swirling mass of blue. A silhouette of a humanoid stood on the opposite side of the portal. The sihouette picked up something palm-sized, pulled its arm back, and threw it through the gateway across the unimaginable distance. The sensor pod landed, all blinking lights and recording sensors, only half a meter from where the rodent sat. Curiousity froze the rodent in place, but even if it hadn't, fear had liquidized its legs till they felt like jelly and moved like blocks of stone. The sensor pod was a sphere, with windows to allow some sensor apparatus or another to view the outside world and make recordings of what it observed. A cable attached the sensor unit to a reading panel back on the opposite side of the gateway. The silhouette studied this panel for a moment. When it was satisfied, the silhouette took the cable in its hands and pulled the sensor pod to the opposite side of the gateway. The gateway shimmered for a split second, then it winked out of existance. The rodent twitched its whiskers a few times. Finally, the events that had just transpired forgotten, it realized it was hungry. It scurried off to its favorite piece of obsolete machinery to snack on some of the wires found inside. *****